The London Legal System in 1900: Some Amusing Anecdotes

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Following are some anecdotes from Arthur H. Beavan's brief overview of London's legal system in Imperial London, first published in 1901:

Law proceedings are supposed to be dull and dry affairs; but the Courts are sometimes entertained with extraordinary, and often intensely comical experiences, two of which I will conclude with.

In the Admiralty Court a few years ago, at the opening of a case that was being tried, the counsel stated that since the institution of the proceedings, three of his witnesses had died.

The Q.C. on the other side then rose and informed the astonished Judge that his principal witness, too, was deceased, whilst another had been relegated to a lunatic asylum, and that the chief defendant in the case had been knocked down by an omnibus and was lamed.

This should have surely ended the chapter of casualties, but to round them off, as it were, the leading counsel himself, the following day, as he was approaching the Courts, was knocked down by a hansom cab, though happily without much injury.

The comic side is illustrated by a peculiar experience of the late Lord Justice Ludlow, whose mildness and amiability once led to very unforeseen results.

A witness was being sorely badgered in cross-examination respecting his denial of being intoxicated.

The Judge, desirous of mitigating as much as possible the counsel's abruptness, kindly asked the witness, "Did you say, 'I was not drunk, sir?' "

"I never said anything about you at all," was the unexpected reply that set the Court in a roar of laughter.

To a past legal generation, the City Courts were synonymous with an Imperium in Imperio, necessitating that certain cases could be tried only within the square mile that constitutes the domain of the Lord Mayor; but the particular Court appealing most forcibly to the laic imagination was that of the London Sheriffs' in Church Passage, Guildhall Yard, where blighted affection was wont to seek, and generally found, some mitigation of its woes through the healing process of an action for breach of promise.

Delightfully varied were the records of this tribunal.

At one of its sittings, no fewer than six distinct cases of the kind were tried one after another, amongst the plaintiffs being a burlesque actress, a governess, a barmaid, and a domestic servant; the frail defendants including an heir to a dukedom, an American millionaire, a sailor, and, mirabile dictu, a solicitor !

These touching causes d'amours do not appear to be on the decline.

Last Hilary term brought with it as large a crop as ever of unrequited love from which the fair damsels sought such consolation as hard cash might afford.

For some occult reason, these cases invariably provide material for mirth, and it is the correspondence between the parties which especially provokes the risibility of the Court, as, for instance, when a faithless young baker writes to his inamorata as follows: " 'Marriages are made in heaven,' they say. I think I shall wait till I get there."

Or when a jilted boarding-house keeper receives from her faithless lover such an effusion as the following: "I feel tonight in a miserable mood, and only wish you were near me, so that I could tell you all my troubles as of old... We must look forward to our meeting again, which I hope will not be very long. Let me know, as soon as you can, how you are, and tell me at the same time, how much I am owing you for those shirts you repaired for me. Very best love to yourself."

Reference to the shirts naturally provoking loud laughter.

Another very entertaining tribunal is the new City of London Court at Guildhall, admirably arranged, and a model of comfort and convenience.

Here Mr. Commissioner Kerr has ruled supreme for forty-one years with a salary of £2400 per annum.

In this Court are tried those delightfully complicated cases relating to collisions, etc, on the part of the vehicles that fill our crowded streets, when apparently each side attempts to swear a trifle harder than the other.

Judge Kerr is famous for his outspokenness, which idiosyncrasy, at the age of eighty, is surely permissible.

But his observations are not always taken in good part, as the following instance will show:

Mr. ___ for the defendant, said he was quite entitled to his costs, which had been properly taxed all through.

Mr. Commissioner Kerr said the £30 was the money of the little child, and the solicitor had no lien on it for the excess costs.

The present claim would be amended by making the little child the plaintiff, and there would be judgment, with costs, for her.

The money would remain in court until she was of age.

Too frequently damages were recovered on behalf of children, who did not get a penny of money.

Mr.___ vigorously protested against the finding, and said the defendant was entitled to his costs.

Mr. Commissioner Kerr: "I will make attorneys do what is right."

Mr.___"You must not act unjustly because a man is an attorney."

Mr. Commissioner Kerr : "There is no injustice. Look here, let your attorney be a little honest for once in his life... I know I say things which are not pleasing to attorneys, but I am obliged to. I will make such remarks while I see the necessity."

Next: London's Legal System in 1900: the County Courts